10 Batman villains we'll never see in the NolanverseEver notice how grim and gritty Christopher Nolan's Batman universe is? The effort to make everything as 'realistic' as possible? I mean, the Batmobile is a tank, Joker was just a crazy guy with a Glasgow smile, and there's no teenage boys running around in bright colors that just scream, "Diversion!" Lame. The villains selected in the Nolan Batman trilogy are all based in this 'reality' he's created. Old, white ninja guy, burlap sack-wearing creep with fear chemicals, crazy person in clown make-up, and...big, beefy guy who sounds like a McDonalds order box. I know I can't be the only one who wanted to see Joker slap Bats in the face with a Joker fish. So, I ask you: where are the awesome powers? The crazy gimmicks? The colorful costumes? The oft-ridiculous origin stories? Read on to see the top ten villains we won't see in the Nolan Bat-movies.* *Yes, I know he's done after Dark Knight Rises, let's pretend that he's making them for the rest of his life for the sake of argument.
Clayface Real name: Basil Karlo First appearance: Detective Comics #40 Schtick: Can shape-shift. Kind of like Carnage or Venom, but, y'know, made of clay. Why we won't see him: He's made of clay. I mean, if they went with his original incarnation it would work. But that was just him as Basil Karlo going to get revenge on the people remaking one of his movies without him as the lead. That would suck. Actually, on second thought...what's Val Kilmer doing these days besides being bloated?
Killer Croc Real name: Waylon Jones First appearance: Detective Comics #523 Schtick: Has a condition that makes him look reptilian, super-strong, eats people Why we won't see him: He has a condition that makes him look reptilian. C'mon guys, get on my level. They could do him if they made him like he appeared in Brian Azzarello's Joker graphic novel, namely a black guy with a skin condition and implications of cannibalism but, similar to Clayface, that's way less interesting than a dude who looks like a crocodile and eats people sans implication.
Killer Moth Real name: Drury Walker/Cameron Van Cleer First appearance: Batman #63 Schtick: Ludicrous costume, fancies himself as the anti-Batman, eventually sold his soul and became a moth monster Why we won't see him: He's seriously one of the lamest dudes ever. Like, Mad Hatter is cooler than him. His costume is garish and he is an F-lister. They tried to make him cooler by turning him into a moth monster, but that only made him less likely to appear in the Nolanverse. He was ripped in half during Infinite Crisis and I'm sure most people were like, "Who was that guy?"
Man-bat Real name: Dr. Kirk Langstrom First appearance: Batman #49 Schtick: Turns into a man-bat, part man, part bat. In the comics, there are now a legion of ninja man-bats. Yikes. Why we won't see him: Because he's a man-bat. Cross-species don't fit into the Nolanverse. That's really more Amazing Spider-Man, and if the game is canon then Morbius will be part bat eventually.
Maxie Zeus Real name: Maximillian Zeus First appearance: Detective Comics #483 Schtick: Insane, thinks he's Zeus, has electricity-based weaponry Why we won't see him: He could work in the Nolanverse, but I think Maxie Zeus is a little too out there for Nolan to use.
Mr. Freeze Real name: Victor Fries First appearance: Batman #121 Schtick: Freezes people with an ice gun, stuck in a suit that keeps his weird temperature-based condition in check, loves his wife a lot Why we won't see him: Everything about him but his motivation (curing his wife and bringing her out of suspended animation) doesn't fit into the Nolanverse; the freeze gun, the suit, it just wouldn't work. But if it did, it would be freaking awesome.
Poison Ivy Real name: Pamela Isley First appearance: Batman #181 Schtick: Plant control, plant-based mind control, very protective of plants, often depicted with green skin Why we won't see her: Her powers are way too fantastic for the Nolanverse, like ten times more than freeze guns. I'd say it also had to do with Batman and Robin, but we've got a new Bane.
Red Hood Real name: Jason Todd First appearance: Batman #357 (as Jason Todd), Batman #635 (as Red Hood) Schtick: Vengeful villain/anti-hero depending on the day of the week, former Robin, died and came back through the most convoluted backdoor in comics history Why we won't see him: The no-Robin rule, his whole murky resurrection thing, and it'd take way too much development to get him to the point to make his appearance as Red Hood meaningful. Just go see Captain America: Winter Soldier instead. They're basically the same character.
Solomon Grundy Real name: Cyrus Gold First appearance: All-American Comics #61 Schtick: Born on a Monday, christened on Tuesday, married on Wednesday, took ill on Thursday, grew worse on Friday, died on Saturday, buried on Sunday, came back from the dead super-strong and partially made of swamp and wood on Monday Why we won't see him: He's a perpetually-resurrecting zombie, and not traditionally a Batman villain (although he had major Bat-time in Jeph Loeb's Long Halloween and Dark Victory, as well as an awesome surprise appearance in Arkham City)
Ventriloquist Real name: Arnold Wesker First appearance: Detective Comics #583 Schtick: Meek, arguably mediocre ventriloquist who either has multiple personalities or is bent to the whim of an evil ventriloquist dummy carved from gallows wood Why we won't see him: Conceivable but ultimately ridiculous. Reread his schtick. So there you have it. Ten reasons the comics are better. When you're stuck with a decidedly non-Arabic Ra's al Ghul and white Bane, a grim and gritty world where Batman could really exist seems a little less exciting compared to gangster dummies, vengeful ex-sidekicks and sexy redheads that can crush you with a giant plant tendril. Did you know? You can now get daily or weekly email notifications when humans reply to your comments.
2:00 PM on 05.07.2013 Concept art for Darren Aronofsky's Batman: Year OneConcept art from the scrapped Darren Aronofsky-led Batman: Year One adaptation were recently unearthed by the Comic Book Movie guys. The images (which are in the gallery below) show a much more realistic, down-to-ea...
2:30 PM on 04.12.2013 Batman fights for family and lives for love!I love you and your genre flips, ABC Family. [via YouTube]
8:30 AM on 03.04.2013 Rumor: Nolan overseeing Justice League, Bale will returnAfter Will Beall's Justice League script got thrown out, things looked really bleak for Warner Bros. and DC Comics. But according to a scoop from Latino Review, WB is now turning to two people who've been successful for them...
4:00 PM on 02.13.2013 Rumor: Batman might not wait for Justice LeagueBefore I start, I am calling this a rumor because there isn't a whole lot of substantial evidence backing this up. Take this with a grain of salt. I'm not calling Batman-on-Film liars by any means; however, let's hope that Wa...
4:00 PM on 12.11.2012 Bane really loves nutrition in this awesome "outtake" vidNormally I'm not a huge fan of fan dubs (because most of the time they're juvenile and asinine), but this set of Bane "outtakes," from YouTube user Auralnauts, is just excellent. I'd like to think the dub is so great because...
1:00 PM on 12.06.2012 Never before seen Dark Knight concept art is horrifyingRob Bliss, a concept artist for most of the Harry Potter films and the upcoming Jack the Giant Killer Slayer, also did some work for Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight. Bliss mocked up versions of the Joker, Two-Face, a...
5:00 PM on 11.27.2012 Rumour: Joseph-Gordon Levitt as Justice League's Batman?I'm going to assume everyone who wanted to see The Dark Knight Rises has seen it by now, so won't be skirting around spoilers - as though the headline hadn't given everything away already. At the end of the movie, Christian B...
7:00 PM on 11.21.2012 Get a glimpse of Tom Hardy's transformation into BaneTom Hardy's Bane proved to be a capable foil to Christian Bale's Batman, strange accent aside, and I don't think anyone who isn't familiar with what Hardy looks like would recognize him as the the bulky bad-guy, even if you h...
2:00 PM on 11.19.2012 Three unused posters for The Dark Knight RisesWith The Dark Knight Rises hitting DVD and Blu-ray on December 4th, the last thing you'd expect would be some new poster art. (Well, that and the Spanish Inquisition.) The marketing/advertising firm Trailer Park showed off th...
1:00 PM on 11.15.2012 NYC: Spend an evening with Christopher Nolan - 11/28On Wednesday, November 28th, Christopher Nolan will be at the Film Society of Lincoln Center to discuss his body of work. The discussion will be moderated by Film Comment contributing editor Scott Foundas. If you live in the ...
|