Who doesn't love Turkey Day? A day of food, family, and gratitude for all you have. It's great. Unless, of course, your family is going away and you don't have any personal days from work to go with them!
That being said, I'm still thankful that the day itself is a paid day off. I'll get myself some ground turkey and whip up a depressing single man's Cheeseburger Helper, strip down to my underoos, and eat my feast-for-one in the dark.
"But, Sean," you say, "that sounds mightily depressing!" Sure it does, but fortunately I have a pretty delicious Thanksgiving movie queue set up to stave off the crushing loneliness. What movies could possibly beat back the soul-crushing pain of being alone for the holidays? Join me and I'll tell you allllllll about it...
They Live (1988)
I've gone on at great length about my love for this movie. John Carpenter's tale of magic glasses that let you see that we're all being brainwashed by aliens (or Shepherds Ferry, it's hard to tell anymore) is just great. The drifter-comes-to-town-and-stumbles-upon-a-global-conspiracy plot is so simple and perfect, and the execution is surgical. Rowdy Roddy Piper plays the aforementioned drifter who gets the magic glasses, and he proceeds to do whatever he can to save the day. Along with future Vice-President, Keith Davidson, he manages to expose the alien conspiracy and save the day...maybe? What happens after the aliens are exposed? Do they just go home with their tails between their legs? I've only just now thought about this. The dreadful unknowns aside, They Live is an excellent piece of 80's B-movie that no depression-fueled holiday marathon should be without.
Back to the Future 2 (1989)
As perfect of a movie as the first Back to the Future is, I don't think I've ever passed Back to the Future II on TV and not watched it through until the end. Unlike the first installment of this trilogy, Back to the Future II actually, y'know, goes to the future. There's multiple timelines, two Marty McFly's at the same time, flying cards, and Thomas F. Wilson in old man make-up. One of the many gems on the crown of Michael J. Fox, Back to the Future II stands the test of time as one of the great sci-fi comedies, forever cementing it in the Sean Walsh library of 'things to do when everyone I love is eating turkey elsewhere.'
Event Horizon (1997)
One of my all-time favorite sci-fi horror movies, Event Horizon is just terrific. A group of unsuspecting people answer a missing ship's distress call and horrible, terrifying things happen to them. I first watched this film (in my adult life, anyway) the day Dead Space came out, and I could not believe I waited so long. Googling for images from the film to use for this article reminded me of those horrific visions of what happened to the other ship's crew, and it got under my skin like a charm. I'm especially excited to rewatch this film and examine those quick glimpses we get into the madness that befell those poor souls. Event Horizon is gleefully dark, especially with a performance for the ages by Sam Neil, and the perfect film to pair with a bag of powdered mashed potatoes.
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Ah, yes, my favorite film of all time. Shaun of the Dead is one of those delightful films that you discover something new in every time you watch it. Even now, after watching it at least a dozen times, I discovered a nice easter egg while looking for images to splice together for the header image: when Shaun is brainstorming plans to save his girlfriend and mother, it shows him with a mug as he winks to the viewer. The mug says "I am a genius." Genius. Any time I feel down, I can pop this movie on and come out the other side much happier. Hopefully, Thanksgiving will be no different, as I take it in whilst eating gelled cranberry sauce right out of the can. (Also, I've been told by one very attractive young lady that I resemble Nick Frost, in a good way, which goes a long way)
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Finally, the best film of the year (in my humble opinion at least) to close out a marathon for the ages. I have no issues whatsoever with Guardians of the Galaxy. It was an absolute laugh riot, had a bevy great characters played by amazing actors, expanded the mega-arc of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and was so much more than just a comic book movie. With a few scant exceptions, everyone I know that has seen this movie has fallen in love with it. I can't wait to relive every second of its 122 minute running time as I drink from my nearly empty gravy dish and eat the last of the store-bought apple pie with my hands.
Well, there you have it: five films I'm thankful for! Who needs family, a home-cooked meal, and human interaction when you have your favorite films? Not me, that's for sure. No sir.
I'm so alone.
can cause it. You can fix it by adding *.disqus.com to your whitelists.