The other night, I was telling my friends about the only scene with an animal dying that I can bear to watch. In The Toxic Avenger, a dog is shot. This isn't usually a thing I can take. It's normally the kind of scene that leads to crying and putting on the happiest movie at hand. In Toxie, however, the dog simply lays on the ground in a pile of spaghetti, panting in that adorable way that makes it look like it has a big, goofy smile. Not only is the dog perfectly fine, but it's totally going to eat that spaghetti in a few minutes. I saw The Toxic Avenger for the first time on Netflix, so clearly it wouldn't disappoint now, right?
Not so. Not only was the original movie gone, but all its sequels and the animated series had disappeared along with it. I had to turn to Hulu. Hulu. Do you see what you're doing to us, Netflix? You're tearing us apart.
In other news, Bollywood has taken Netflix by storm this week, and the movies all seem like they've taken their titles from the text transcripts of teenagers. While Luv Ka the End makes an admirable effort, I think Mujhse Fraaandship Karoge wins the contest for most annoying title. I'm sure it means something clever in Hindi, but I can only imagine a bunch of people from The Valley calling their fraaands to hang out. "Hey, why won't you go to the movies with me? I thought you were my fraaand!" Clearly, my American perceptions are far more important than cultural sensitivity.
Hit the jump for a lot of dancing, but not for any radioactive superheroes. We see where your loyalties lie, Netflix.
New additions to Netflix Watch Instantly apply only to readers in the United States. For those in other parts of the world, your choices may vary.