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The Forest Review photo

Review: The Forest

I’ve written before about how wimpy I am at horror movies. I don’t know that I’m “scared” easily, but I’m exceedingly jumpy. A loud sound, sudden movement, or anything of that sort will launch me out of m...

 
 
Pez photo

Pez is getting a movie for some reason

SERIOUSLY WHO IS DOING THIS TO US? F**king Smarties would've made a better movie than this. Or Fruit Stripe. Or Runts. Or basically every other terrible candy.  “PEZ Candy is beloved by children and adults alike, with Camer...

 
 
 
Review: Human Centipede 3 photo

Review: The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)

I did not care for the first Human Centipede. It was a generic torture porn with a couple gimmicks in the centipede itself and the claim of being 100% medically accurate. As a jaded horror fan, I spent most of it yawning (cringing only duri...

 
 
TMNT  photo

Michael Bay's Ninja Turtles might look super ugly

I'm not the hugest fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but I understand the very thought of Michael Bay going through a franchise I enjoy and possibly mucking up the whole thing for everybody. And even if I'll stick by Michael Bay (giv...

 
 
A Haunted House 2 photo

First teaser trailer for A Haunted House 2...exists

I finally saw the first A Haunted House on Netflix a few months ago with some cool buddies of mine. We all walked away thinking terrible things about it. It not only had one, but three Saints Row: The Third posters hanging in the main...

 
 
Best Night Ever trailer photo

First trailer for Best Night Ever is not the best ever

Best Night Ever seeks to parody the likes of party films such as Spring Breakers and every bacholerette party movie ever. What Best Night Ever fails to do, however, is make any of it funny. Although it's most likely too early to judge an e...

 
 




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Wonderstruck"When the might of artifice meets the disappointing limitations of realism"

 

The Foreigner"Jackie Chan has a certain set of skills, too"

 

The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected)"Damaged people, decent people, dysfunctional families"

 

NYFF Lady Bird"Fly, birdy, fly"

 

The Mountain Between Us"Why didn't they eat the dog?"

 

My Little Pony: The Movie"Straight to the glue factory"

 

Blade Runner 2049"Does Hollywood dream of electric reboots?"

 

Cult of Chucky"Don't cults require followers?"

 

NYFF Zama"Strange and without category, Lucrecia Martel's return to filmmaking is the best and most idiosyncratic movie of 2017"

 

Jeepers Creepers 3"Where does he get those wonderful toys?"

 

Battle of the Sexes"A back and forth volley never settling on a tone"

 

NYFF Thelma"Everything you need and more"

 

American Made"Sex, drugs, and Tom Cruise"

 

NYFF Last Flag Flying"Richard Linklater standing at attention, but not at ease or at rest"

 

Preacher (Season 2)"Adapting the unadaptable"

 

Mother!"Mother of god this is pretentious"

 

American Assassin"American Ass"

 

It"Stephen King's scariest adaptation to date"

 

Good Time"Robert Pattinson: Vampire, no more"

 

Logan Lucky"No relation to Wolverine"

 

The Defenders (Season 1)"Masters of karate and friendship "