Trailers

Charles Bronson impersonator sports nips, battles serial killer in trailer for Cry Havoc

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Robert Bronzi, a man you might remember from a rip-off so blatant it’s actually kind of endearing, is officially making a career of looking an awful lot like Charles Bronson. This just goes to prove that Hollywood really is all about the looks.

And I’m all for it. This has to be cheaper than resurrection via CGI, and it’s giving a man a job. Everyone has to hustle, and sometimes that hustle is looking like a Terminator wearing Charles Bronson’s skin. Good for him.

Maybe Bronzi can use his fresh income to buy himself some sleeves, because in the above trailer for Cry Havoc he looks cold as hell. I feel bad for him. Sometimes you got to fight a psycho with a face wrapped in barbed wire, sure, but there’s no reason to do it while you’re freezing to the point that your chest is getting cell phone reception. Or maybe he’s just excited. I don’t know. Hopefully, it’s a part of the plot.

The film itself, from Rene Perez, the same director as Death Kiss, looks like some cheesy fun. Following a reporter who scores a chance to interview one of the FBI’s most wanted, she finds out that this dude has a murderous monster of a man who kills on call, and now her only hope is a rogue policeman searching for his daughter.

As long as it’s not boring, probably good for a rental with some booze and buds. There’s no word yet on when Cry Havoc will reach a VOD service near you.

Kyle Yadlosky
Kyle Yadlosky only cares about trash. The trippy, bizarre, DIY, and low-budget are his home. He sleeps in dumpsters and eats tinfoil. He also writes horror fiction sometimes.