Deadpool to be Rated-R, forever, Disney vows on the immortal heart of Walt, buried in the depths of Mount Space


Mickey & Donald clamor to star in R-Rated cop-buddy drama

Ever since rumors began to swirl like magical snowflakes straight out of Frozen, nerds worldwide have been considering the ramifications of the Disney acquisition of Fox. Front and center and marked as 'of vital importance' were the impacts on everyone's favorite red-spandex-wearing bad guy, Deadpool, and his dirty little mouth. Would big brother Mickey hike up his suspenders and put Deadpool in line with longstanding Disney tradition and values?

Mickey: No no, Deadpool, we say 'Oh boy!'

Deadpool: Oh fuck.

Mickey: Haha, no Deadpool, 'Oh boy!'

Deadpool: Oh fuck me.

Mickey: Gee Deadpool, I think we might have to try some enhanced learning techniques! Ohhhhh Toooooodles! Can you bring me the car battery and jumper cables, please? Haha!

But never fear, Bog Iger, Disney CEO quickly took too a conference call with investors, and hey, the moneybags were concerned about this too, as it was quickly brought up: 'But what about Deadpool and his dirty little mouth?'

To paraphrase, essentially Iger, hot off the $52.4B acquisition of Fox's assets, promised that Deadpool has a home and a future at Disney, even an R-Rated one, as long as people are warned up front. How the hell are they going to prepare people any better than they did last time? Personalized dick pic text messages from Deadpool to anyone who buys a ticket to future Deadpool movies, complete with horribly burned skin?

Deadpool to Stay R-Rated Under Disney Ownership [Den of Geek]

Photo Credit [Reilly Brown]

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Rick Lash
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