Get ready for a bloody tournament of vehicular slaughter to reach a TV screen near you as Sony’s newly formed Playstation Productions plans to bring their Twisted Metal franchise to life as a series. I hope they let David Jaffe executive produce.
This is the best idea of all best ideas, and I can’t wait to see how they even attempt to cast any of this.
Playstation Productions, made to bank on the recent success of video game-based movies that are actually kind of good, will have Sony working in-house to bring its properties to film and television. They’re currently working on that Uncharted movie that keeps not happening, and now they’ve announced Twisted Metal at an investors meeting. There’s not much more to go on than that, since it’s in really early stages. This is the best time to get excited, though, when the sky’s still the limit and we haven’t been crushed down by the reality of the project.
Twisted Metal is a video game series about a bunch of Loony Tunes psychos in a vehicular tournament of death and destruction set up like a game show. Think Death Race, but somehow more bonkers, and competitors cut out the idea of a race and just straight-up focus on killing each other. There’s a serial killer clown who drives an ice cream truck of endless death named Sweet Tooth. Who could they possibly have play him? Bautista? It looks like he’s going to be in everything right now, so why not? We’ll have to find somewhere to fit Danny Trejo, though. This is exactly the kind of production that demands his name be attached.
Most importantly, though, is whether or not they’re going to use the iconic Rob Zombie soundtrack from Twisted Metal 3, which I guess is the one everyone hates, but that’s the only one I played as a kid, and we loved it. We played the game so much that the Playstation stopped reading the game information on the disc and would only load the soundtrack, so then we just used the music on there as our entrance themes when we wrestled on the living room floor. Oh, to be young again.
Rob Zombie should direct this. I can’t believe I’m saying these words, and I don’t think I’ll ever say them again, but Rob Zombie really needs to direct this show. His hyper-trash horror vision might actually be perfect for a series as absurd and gleefully violent as a Twisted Metal series would need to be.
Also, there’s a character named Axel who’s literally just a guy with his arms and legs plugged into two giant monster truck wheels. He rolls around like that shooting at people from rocket launchers mounted on this shoulders. How do you turn this into a series? How do you make any of this work? How do you do a season two when everyone dies?
This has to be such an expensive concept, too. Endless car battles and vehicle explosions and fires. How do you make it work? Will it be animated?
There’s no way this won’t be a highway pileup-style disaster, and I can’t wait.