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The Forest Review photo

Review: The Forest

I’ve written before about how wimpy I am at horror movies. I don’t know that I’m “scared” easily, but I’m exceedingly jumpy. A loud sound, sudden movement, or anything of that sort will launch me out of m...

 
 
Pez photo

Pez is getting a movie for some reason

SERIOUSLY WHO IS DOING THIS TO US? F**king Smarties would've made a better movie than this. Or Fruit Stripe. Or Runts. Or basically every other terrible candy.  “PEZ Candy is beloved by children and adults alike, with Camer...

 
 
 
Review: Human Centipede 3 photo

Review: The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)

I did not care for the first Human Centipede. It was a generic torture porn with a couple gimmicks in the centipede itself and the claim of being 100% medically accurate. As a jaded horror fan, I spent most of it yawning (cringing only duri...

 
 
TMNT  photo

Michael Bay's Ninja Turtles might look super ugly

I'm not the hugest fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but I understand the very thought of Michael Bay going through a franchise I enjoy and possibly mucking up the whole thing for everybody. And even if I'll stick by Michael Bay (giv...

 
 
A Haunted House 2 photo

First teaser trailer for A Haunted House 2...exists

I finally saw the first A Haunted House on Netflix a few months ago with some cool buddies of mine. We all walked away thinking terrible things about it. It not only had one, but three Saints Row: The Third posters hanging in the main...

 
 
Best Night Ever trailer photo

First trailer for Best Night Ever is not the best ever

Best Night Ever seeks to parody the likes of party films such as Spring Breakers and every bacholerette party movie ever. What Best Night Ever fails to do, however, is make any of it funny. Although it's most likely too early to judge an e...

 
 




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Reviews   filter by...

The Goldfinch"The real deal or fool's gold?"

 

Promare"BURN TO THE GROUND"

 

One Cut of the Dead"Heart-felt brain munching"

 

IT Chapter Two"But are there vomiting turtles?"

 

Satanic Panic"Always tip your drivers"

 

The Peanut Butter Falcon"Who doesn't like Mark Twain?"

 

Artik"The evils of murder and whiskey"

 

Clownado"Cyclownin' around"

 

Ready or Not"Let's play a game"

 

Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus"PHASE TWOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

 

The Amazing Johnathan Documentary"The man, the meth, the legerdemain"

 

Where'd You Go, Bernadette"Eh, she'll come back eventually"

 

Good Boys"Kissing party"

 

Driven"John DeLorean's shattered dream "

 

Long Gone By"Moral conundrum with ice cream "

 

Millennium Actress"A classic revived"

 

The Art of Racing in the Rain"No paws, all wheels"

 

The Kitchen"Half-cooked"

 

Dora and the Lost City of Gold"Can you say "mediocre?""

 

The Nightingale"Heed the black bird's call"

 

The VelociPastor"Not to be confused with The TriceraCops"

 

Nekrotronic"Pokemon GHOST"

 

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (Season 3)"Space is warped and time is bendable"