Now, now. Dry your tears. We know you’re so terrible upset that the Stretch Armstrong movie won’t be happening anymore that you’re most likely curled up in a corner hugging your childhood Stretch Armstrong toy cursing the world for its cruelty.
Or you didn’t even know it was happening. Well it was. Now it’s not.
Relativity, the company who was producing the film along with Hasbro released a statement saying that they and Hasbro are going to focus on other projects instead of pursuing the forever-in-production Stretch Armstrong movie. This is most likely because it’s a pretty dumb idea that only got a green light when everyone was toy movie crazy thanks to Transformers. Of course Hasbro doesn’t see it that way as Relativity tells it, “Stretch Armstrong is an incredible character who will make an amazing movie, and we know that Hasbro has some new ideas they are looking at.”
Amazing ideas like not making a movie about a character who actually isn’t a real character?