Trailer: The Canyons

The Canyons is the result of Paul Schrader and Bret Easton Ellis’s Kickstarter. People paid money for this to exist. Unfortunately, I think those people were just under the wrong impression. I also think a lot of people are going to be disappointed for entirely the wrong reasons. They won’t be disappointed they saw a bad movie, they’ll be disappointed it wasn’t some kind of pornography. 

Go ahead, tell your friends that Lindsay Lohan and James Deen (if you don’t know who that is, for the love of Jebus do not Google it) are in a movie together, I’ll wait (especially you two, Matty and Vkmies). You back? Your friends ask if the two get it on? That’s right they did. One of the taglines for The Canyons is “It’s definitely not The Hills” which totes sounds like those Not XXX (insert show or movie title here, haha I said insert) porn parodies. 

Unless Breast Easton Ellis wrote a porno, we’re sadly getting some F-Grade movie material here. Who knows, maybe this turns out to be some “so bad it’s good” stuff? There’s no set release date as of now (of course not), so I guess we’ll find out when we find out.