By Another weekend down. The Smurfpocalypse is over. Who is still standing?
I hope your movie watching experiences over the weekend were both engaging and rewarding. With any luck, they bestowed upon you knowledge never-ending while enriching everything about you. Perhaps they even made you better looking.
Basically, I’m hoping that you’ll tell me that you saw anything but The Smurfs this weekend. Please comment and tell me this.
As far as I’m concerned, there’s nothing in the world that could make me want to see The Smurfs, not even if Neil Patrick Harris were in it. Wait, he is in it? Nope, still not going anywhere near that thing. Sorry, Neil. You’re magical, but not that magical.
If you’re in the mood for something blue, then you can instead watch something blue glow on Daniel Craig’s wrist in Cowboys & Aliens. There’s a definite possibility that the movie’s not going to be any good, but won’t it be nice if it turns out to be amazing? Then we won’t have to find an alternate excuse to see it. “Er, um, Olivia Wilde,” isn’t the most appropriate of responses.
How about Crazy Stupid Love? It’s definitely going to be good because it requires two modifiers simply to describe how BANANAS that love is. Limited releases include about nineteen million films, so if you’re going to see one of those, let us know which one. Otherwise, succumb to your shame and let us know which smurf you’re most looking forward to seeing shirtless.