Mermaid’s Song trailer proves trailers can be made while sleeping

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Citizens rejoice! October is right around the corner and that means a slew of cheesy horror movies coming out that cost about 4 nickels and a button to make. That’s not to say they can’t be good, but its definitely a “throw it on a wall and see what sticks” kinda mentality: the more these tiny studios can churn out, the more likely one will become the next Blair Witch. So when I see something like the trailer for Mermaid’s Song, while I’m not saying it won’t be the next horror indie hit to make hundreds of millions of dollars, I’m definitely saying it won’t be the next horror indie hit to make hundreds of millions of dollars.

There was at least a little promise before I pressed play. It’s a period piece set in the 1930s, which could mean flappers, prohibition and other dandy things like Iwan Rheon of sadistic Ramsay Bolton fame in a leading role. Unfortunately, the trailer loses steam at about the three second mark when you realize this is actually a straight-faced horror movie about a mermaid. It’s surprisingly bland for the odd material, with an old lady speaking mysteriously about mermaids as jump cuts try to trick you into thinking people standing around is scary. Weirdest of all, there’s like no water in the trailer; it looks like the whole movie will take place on a farm in Iowa.

As we all know, a trailer is tiny film all its own, not at all indicative of the film’s final quality. The film is also set to release on VOD instead of theatres, but the absolutely incredible Mandy proves that can’t be a signifier either. That being said, this whole thing is one big “meh”; I sped up the 1-minute trailer I got so bored. So, fittingly, I’m gonna review it this week. Yay. Mermaid’s Song releases on VOD September 18.