As a quick aside before this review, I did not expect to watch two films about the struggles of deaf individuals at this year’s New York Asian Film Festival. That was kind of a happy accident when I was browsing through different pictures to watch. Really, the main reason I watched The Way We Talk is that I was recommended it by a director/writer that I know. I figured she would have a good understanding of where the Hong Kong film industry is at, so I gave it a shot. It’s truly amazing how humans can take a similar concept and create something so wildly different, either through a cultural lens or just a personal one.
With that out of the way, I think there is one major theme that this year’s NYAFF wanted to convey: societal consciousness. Most of the films in rotation are about people fighting against the failings of their respective societies, which seems to be coming to a head in practically every major civilization right now. The Way We Talk is focused solely on the struggle of deaf people, but not just those who cannot hear at all. The film is also something of a story of self-discovery for its main character, a woman who has lived with a cochlear implant for most of her life before being introduced to sign language.
Truly, The Way We Talk showed me the complexities of people living with deafness and how even within what you’d assume is a tight-knit group, there can still be discrimination. It has absolutely changed the way that I understand this disability.
The Way We Talk
Director: Adam Wong
Release Date: December 3, 2024 (Hong Kong Limited), February 20, 2025 (HK), July 19, 2025 (NYAFF)
Country: Hong Kong
The Way We Talk begins during a period when Hong Kong had banned sign language in schools, forcing deaf students to learn what was called “Oralism.” There was actually a similar situation in the United States during the 19th and early 20th centuries where schools were prohibited from teaching sign language. Strangely, Alexander Graham Bell was vehemently opposed to it, likely because he wanted to sell more telephones, but I digress. This film picks up with young boys Wolf Yip (Neo Yau as adult, Nathan Cheng as child) and Alan Ng (Marco Ng as adult, Jesse Wong as child) who have formed a friendship over their shared disability. Wolf is very strong-willed and actually takes pride in his deafness, routinely defying his teacher and signing in class. Alan appreciates Wolf’s dedication and the two often cause trouble for their teacher, who is so strict about classroom policy that she berates them in front of the class.
Flash forward some years later, and we catch up with Sophie Fong (Chung Suet Ying), a recently graduated actuarial science major who also happens to be deaf. At a young age, she underwent CI (cochlear implant) surgery, and because of this, she has now become an ambassador for the surgery. There she meets Alan, who, despite having gotten CI surgery himself, never stopped learning and using sign language to converse with his friend Wolf. He invites her to give a speech for the implant, and during that event, she makes some comments about how CI surgery has made her feel “normal” again, and how she hopes it can bring about an end to deafness. This sort of triggers Wolf, who feels he is being looked down on simply because he decided to embrace his disability rather than modify it.
From there, The Way We Talk shifts into more of a character focus than strict narrative, with the story being about the interactions Sophie has with Alan and Wolf and her journey of self-discovery regarding her disability. Sophie wasn’t born deaf, but rather was sick at a young age and lost her hearing. Her mother, wanting to give Sophie an average life, urged her to get CI surgery so that she wouldn’t need to struggle in a mostly aural world. There was also the aforementioned focus on oralism, which had become official policy in Hong Kong schools during Sophie’s youth. Without knowing it, Sophie was being pushed to hide her true self rather than embrace what she truly felt inside.
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While I won’t make too many direct comparisons to this year’s The Hearing from the Philippines, The Way We Talk does borrow a few of the same tricks from that film. At points, the audio will go almost entirely silent as we get put into Wolf’s perspective. We see him struggle with certain individuals who simply have no idea how to handle communication with a deaf person, or how his disability can unintentionally cause problems. The film also employs an approximation of what people with CI implants hear, which is speech that can sound muffled or almost mechanical. More than The Hearing, it doesn’t come off as gimmicky by the end because there is a clearer intentionality behind its application.
The main gist of the story is about Sophie, though, and what she starts to understand from being around Wolf. Shortly after first encountering him, Sophie is hired at an insurance firm as an assistant actuary. At first, she’s not quite sure she fits in, but in doing some research on the company website, she realizes she is being used more to promote the company’s DEI hires rather than for her skills. Coupled with the new appreciation she has for Wolf’s strength against his disability, she begins to wonder if maybe she should have fought back against her mom and learned sign language all those years ago.
It’s an incredibly poignant journey that carries many different layers. On the one hand, there’s the examination of how discriminated groups can, in turn, discriminate against each other. At first, Sophie has the perspective that sign language is something of a lesser form of communication, but she quickly learns its benefits and uniqueness. There’s also something about state-mandated propaganda shifting public consensus in there, though the story doesn’t linger on that angle. On another hand, we have Sophie’s desire to truly express her feelings, something she has never felt comfortable doing before sign language. Lastly, there are even bits about how society simply isn’t equipped to handle deafness, wishing to “overcome” the disability rather than embrace and build around it.
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Sophie’s journey is also contrasted against Wolf’s specific story, which sees him training to be a diving instructor. Being that he’s fully deaf, Wolf’s job prospects are limited, and he’s typically bouncing between different jobs. For most of the film, he is doing car washing, and Alan helps him develop something of a brand to promote himself. He creates a small company that employs deaf people as a way to give back to the community he’s always been a part of. While that is going on, Wolf is also studying hard for his diving exam and taking classes despite the language barrier. Sophie helps him with organizing his notes, and the two learn about the specificities of their lifestyles.
As I said, it’s very poignant, not to mention filled with that typical Hong Kong melodrama. Sophie obviously clashes with Alan and Wolf at times, with the two offering wildly different takes on what deafness means. Everyone is ultimately supportive, but throughout the film, I was taken by how contemplative and insightful Sophie’s inner thoughts were. To reveal something of myself, going deaf is one of my biggest fears, as hearing is so integral to the human experience. I’ve never looked down on anyone who can’t hear, but I’ve also never realized how unhelpful society can be for people with the disability. There are lots of aspects of life I take for granted that deaf or hearing-impaired individuals will constantly run up against.
One of the things I’ve always hoped for in this world is that humanity can eventually put an end to suffering. I’ve even written something to that effect across these different reviews for the festival. No one should be given a less-than-ideal hand in life. At the same time, having a disability doesn’t mean you’re worthless. It’s an extra barrier to living a happy life, for certain, but you don’t become a burden or a piece of garbage because of a physical or mental ailment. With how wealthy society is, there is no reason why anyone with a disability should be struggling so much in the modern era. We should have these systems figured out.
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I can recall situations in my youth where I would turn to my mother and say, “I feel sorry for that person,” when I saw someone with a disability. In a child’s mind, they simply see someone less fortunate and hope for the best. As you grow older, though, you begin to realize that disabled people aren’t looking for sympathy or pity. They just want to be treated as humans. It’s not wrong to wish you can help everyone, but you also should help them because they are human, not because they are “abnormal.” Wolf’s strong-willed nature strengthened that for me.
Now, I can’t say that The Way We Talk is a perfect movie. At times, the pacing can be very start-and-stop, and the film definitely drags on a bit. Running a bit over two hours, it’s also a long journey, though I understand that’s an intentional part of the story. Being deaf isn’t something that ever goes away, even if you have a CI implant, so the film running long is more like drilling into the audience that this is a lifelong battle. Still, the fragmented and sometimes episodic nature of its plot can make moments drone on, which isn’t exactly enjoyable to sit through.
That’s really the worst thing I could say here, though. I really appreciate everything else that The Way We Talk has going on. It’s got solid acting, great cinematography, an impressive score, all the usual accolades I can throw at a movie. This really feels like more than just a film, however. It’s not an experience you put on and simply forget later. It imparts some actual humanity onto you by showing very real struggles that most societies face, even if this one is specifically about Hong Kong.
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I’m not sure if this review is really even about The Way We Talk anymore, but it doesn’t need to be. This film awakened something within me that has given me a desire to become a better person. If that’s not strong enough praise, then nothing else I can say will be.
