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Wesley Snipes, KISS, the WWE, and the Power Rangers make a movie

It begins like a joke you’d hear from a true social recluse: what do Wesley Snipes, Gene Simmons, World Wrestling Entertainment and Saban Films (a subsidiary of Saban Entertainment, owners of the Power Rangers) have in common? And the answer, based on logic, all possible randomly drawn conclusions, and the entire span of human history, is surely one bad movie.

When you hear that Mr. Snipes, Mr. Simmons, and the WWE have joined forces to make a film, and that Saban Films has taken a shine to their Megazord formation and will distribute the film, Armed Response, it’s an understandable conclusion to form. Especially given that it’s a “sci-fi” film. Oh and that both Gene Simmons, and one or more WWE “superstars” (Seth Rollins) are co-starring in the film. When has Wesley Snipes ever stood for sci-fi?

Variety reports:

John Stockwell (“Blue Crush”) directed from Matt Savelloni’s script, which follows a team of highly trained operatives who find themselves trapped inside an isolated military compound after its artificial intelligence is suddenly shut down. The crew begins to experience strange and horrific phenomena as they attempt to uncover what killed the previous team. The film is currently in post-production. It was originally called “Temple” as part of a three-film deal announced in 2015 between WWE and Simmons.

Seriously? Seriously, this is what nerd film addict writers like myself live for, and this week is just lobbing up easy slams. First we had Shia LaBeouf opening a movie in the UK that sold just one ticket, and now this.

Truth be told, I love Wesley Snipes! I’m glad he’s out of jail and back to making movies, not only is he part of a dying breed of action heroes who were action heroes owing to their indomitable size or real fighting skills, not only did he fill 90s filmmaking slates, but he also stars in some of my favorite worst movies ever (White Men Can’t Jump, Demolition Man). My point being that I was excited to see a headline on Variety promising a new Snipes vehicle. But then I read the article and became less excited more sullen. And then I thought about writing about the article and was once more excited: I knew I had to share these laughs of joy with all of you.

You’re welcome.

 

 

 

[Via Variety]

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